Senator Alan Simpson

September 1, 2010

I presume that you’ve followed the controversy with Senator Simpson sending rude letters to the Older Women’s League. I wouldn’t argue with their base claim that Senator Simpson is sexist, but give me a fucking break. They’re saying that Senator Simpson was being sexist for saying that people were sucking on the tits of Social Security. Because we all know that when people talk about suckling, we’re all referring to women’s breasts. No, you daffy bastard, he’s referring to a milk cow. He even said, and I quote, “a milk cow with 310 million tits.” Nobody refers to “sucking off of the tit” as sucking on a human breast.

The director of OWL, Ashley Carson, backs up her claim by saying that he made several references to her being too stupid to understand the data and that she doesn’t know how to read the graphs, which she says “plays on the stereotype that women are too stupid to do math.” I don’t buy it. Alan Simpson is a self-aggrandizing conservative asshole. He would have said the same thing to me if I had complained to him. He’s saying that ALL people who disagree with him are too stupid to do math. And when she was addressed on the actual meat of the Social Security issue (you now, the thing that they originally complained about), her only real constructive input was that Alan Simpson should be fired and replaced with a woman. No woman in particular– any woman will do. Way to fight that stereotype of understanding the issues.

Ordinarily, it wouldn’t bother me that they were complaining about such things. Sen. Simpson is a righteous asshole, and I’m pretty sure that he is a chauvinist just by virtue of his culture and background. And just as when people with race issues need to bite their lip when they’re talking to black people (Michael Richards) or religious bigots need to back off the zealot talk (Mel Gibson), Sen. Simpson should have watched his mouth when he was sending an official letter to a women’s rights group, and just generally try to stay away from gender-charged language.

HOWEVER, I also know that the one stereotype of women that has the most trouble getting dispelled is that they’re overly sensitive and take everything personally. Just listening to Director Ashley Carson feeds into every stereotype I’ve ever heard of the “uppity bitch.” And I think of every time that one of my female friends has tried to be respected or taken seriously by a man only to have that man dismiss her as a ‘chick with an opinion,’ and how men like that point to women like her as backing to their prejudice. I’m ashamed to be of the same gender as Alan Simpson. Women should be ashamed to be the same gender as Ashley Carson.